Obey

I got sick this morning
I think it’s because I was being very rebellious yesterday.
I didn’t go to church and instead went to a volunteer meeting that i’m not even interested in…
I want my mind to be clear on what I want but I realize instead of picking and choosing on small life decisions it’s best just to obey God.
There are many verses I was given yesterday on the topic.
I’m glad I got sick because it forced my to clean up my spirit, my rationality, and my conscious. But also my bathroom and bedroom.

I am more worried about the health of others around me and the affects of my actions. I hope to be a cleaner person and stop making rash decisions to do things that have no purpose;

Although I helped volunteer supervisors by giving them a list of artists to contact, their deadline was 2 days away and they don’t have time to find anyone anymore although they asked me. They didn’t seem to really appreciate it as much as I had anticipated. Nothing came out of it. 

Although I applied to internships last month, none replied. The volunteer jobs that I did get were things other people could do, and although they are now on my resume, they wasted precious time I could have used on more important things; outside of myself  of course. The little freedom to choose and the little socialization i got out of the experience is nothing in comparison to the realization i now have, which is to obey.

I can’t do anything/everything on my own. The people who think they can may be happy for a while, or stressed thinking their happiness depends on themselves, and the values they think are important. In the end it’s a vicious cycle of human misunderstanding about the meaning of life. 

Now I will just continue studying the bible, doing good deeds, and learning languages. I will stop the ‘seeing is wanting’ practice and stop looking for things that I know I don’t really want. I will put others first,  and strive to study more and give more when I can. 

I will quit the things that lead no where. Once I obey, then I can think about where to go next.

tv lesson

saw so much useless stuff on tv. things appear to teach you something new and its not new. its simple and old and irrelevant. reality tv. only the ones about nature actually matter. i watch tv to change my thinking process but it didn’t help after 1 hr.

Schedule

make a schedule, stick to it

Wednesday am
Email Rotem, break the news
Email potential clients (everyone) Just go!
Make a list send it to him

Pack computer
Go to editing place @ 11
$ lunch

Thursday am
Balloons, Tina
Blood
Dad, picture, home


xclubs


Next week: FREE!!!

Maybe exercise via biking and swimming :)

kansanhamnida
de-lusionate:

. on We Heart It.

For some reason I thought about America today. I haven’t travelled n a while. It’s so huge, and so many people in their different sectors. I thought this because I just finished watching swamp people. I miss it there. And… I realize how much harder I have to act when I realize God, because God controls all those people’s lives too- and we can’t just sit deadweight- unless we want that to be our fate. I just want to stop working physically and start being serious spiritually. This cycle is killer!

de-lusionate:

. on We Heart It.

For some reason I thought about America today. I haven’t travelled n a while. It’s so huge, and so many people in their different sectors. I thought this because I just finished watching swamp people. I miss it there. And… I realize how much harder I have to act when I realize God, because God controls all those people’s lives too- and we can’t just sit deadweight- unless we want that to be our fate. I just want to stop working physically and start being serious spiritually. This cycle is killer!

Regrets of M’s day

I should have explained…

She said as long as your a good person
She said you don’t have to go to church
She said she said

I explained the meaning of the law
and the different standards of good that may hurt someone else
And religion is not about leading a good life
It is a book of predictions of science and history, that lead people to accurate understanding of God

She said details didn’t matter
She quoted the law #1: love they neighbour, but only that.

I didn’t explain about our souls and the reason we are here
I didn’t explain that God’s bible is 100%, so we should read 100% of it not 1%

:( *haugh* I’m sorry

I didn’t give them pamphlets when they asked
I didn’t give a reference before I left to kate

*haugh* i’m sorry

Im sorry to the people who i might have been rude to on the bus/@ bus stop

im happy i put up posters

im happy i didnt need coffee, and instead got a smoothie

im glad i ate that instead of alot of sushi

im happy to see my new sisters preaching, and even giving us tasty snacks during our meetings, and good advice like’ even tho your alarm went off late, you’re here now’


we met a german, french, asian, and others today. there were more opportunities on the way home to talk to strangers than before.

i indulged on a soup and salad at Fresh, with really FRESH! ingredients and am considering going vegetarian- also after watching dr OZ and wanting to plat- i saw cool plant store near my house @ a fruit stand area.

im glad i found a way to exercise n my diining room even though i cant go to the gym. 

i hope the people who didnt understand what i said today- will- and i hope i put my spirit before my image. i was heart broken by those who didnt understand the bible- and also saw the hypocracy and humor in my own feelings when i felt bad about my hair- as if it really matters.

what matters is everyone’s soul. and i realize that everyone needs down time. I was in the washroom thinking, i am here now and when i go to church i will have alot of things to do on my mind. but i am the same person. why am i in 2 different states, here vs there? or anywhere? i started to imagine my friends, members, and family in those states. i realize there is only 1 person in the world, (1!!) who is always in a good/holy state. That is God. Never vegetative in a corner, like we might be in our homes. That blows my mind.

makes me realize it is possible to make the best out of every state in whch we are in. and thats probably why its important in the bible/ mentioned alot.

good night <3